The trend right now of “getting it all done” as a stay-at-home mom, is taking the internet by storm! Everywhere you look on social media you see moms talking about how they supposedly “get it all done”. But what effect does this trend actually have on all of us?
Does this trend inspire stay-at-home moms to be more productive? Sometimes.
Does it give encouragement to moms who are struggling to stay organized? Maybe.
Does this trend tend to push moms to their productivity breaking point and leave them feeling burnt out? Most of the time…YES!
In this blog post I’m sharing how this trend has had both a positive and negative effect on my own life as a stay-at-home mom. I am a productive person by nature and attempting to get it all done has at times, helped me achieve certain goals like redecorating a room or sorting a closet. But if I’m going to be completely honest, this “get it all done” trend has more often than not pushed me into a state of productivity that has not been healthy or balanced.
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Stay-At-Home Mom, Working Mom, Work-At-Home Mom..It Doesn’t Matter
I’m going to start by saying that I have been all 3 of the moms in the above heading! I used to be a working mom who had a career outside of my home. Then, I became a work-at-home mom for quite a few years before becoming what I am now, which is a full-time stay-at-home mom. Therefore, I understand motherhood from all sorts of different angles.
I understand the desire of trying to do and be everything to everyone. There’s always so many to-do lists and never enough time. Then, add in whatever personal goals you set for yourself and all of sudden you feel like you’re just never getting enough done in a day.
It’s a crazy cycle and it’s so easy to get trapped in it.
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The Solution
So what is the solution and how do we as moms protect ourselves from the dopamine hit of “getting it all done”?
Well my friends, I have very recently discovered that the only way to escape the never ending cycle of busyness and over-productivity is, (cue the drumroll)….prioritizing!
I know, that might sound a little dull and anticlimactic…but hear me out.
As moms, we have to be really intentional about deciding what things are most important every day. These are the things we will include in our daily routines. Time management can’t be about trying to fit in more than we can tackle. It needs to be about fitting in the most important things first, and then prioritizing from there.
Things like work time, child care, grocery shopping, your cleaning schedule, etc….these are ALL things that require your attention. But so do things like quiet time, self care, free time and quality time with your family.
As a mom (and in my case, a homeschooling mom), I had to come to the realization that I’m a human being with limitations. Trust me…it was kind of a hard pill to swallow. But in order for me to do anything well and sustainably, I have to keep my priorities in check and pace myself along the way.
I also have to give myself permission to let some things go. And honestly, that’s not easy for me. But in order for me to be healthy physically, mentally, and spiritually I need to expect a little less of myself. And so do you my friend.
Finding Peace With Less
One of the best tips I can give to busy moms is to make peace with doing less. Now, when I say “doing less” I’m not implying that you should ignore your important tasks and lay on the couch all day! What I am implying is that you need to take an honest look at the tasks and goals you have set for yourself, and be realistic when it comes to deciding what NEEDS to be done vs what you WANT to get done.
A great way to do this is by selecting the non-negotiable things first such as your spiritual needs, work, taking care of your home, and spending time with your family. It’s still possible to have a productive day without ignoring your basic needs.
Like I already mentioned, time management is key but so is giving yourself some grace.
“Getting it all done” is a constant temptation for most stay-at-home moms. But do we ever really get it ALL done? No, because there’s always another load of laundry waiting for us, as well as a never ending list of other household chores that need our attention.
In order to be productive parents, we need to remember our own limitations. And that’s OK! Resting during your baby’s nap time instead of tackling another project is not being lazy. And choosing to step back from a commitment that is taking up too much of your extra time doesn’t make you a slacker. (And trust me…I’m preaching to myself here).
You need to get to a place where you can find peace with doing less, give yourself the grace you deserve and realize that caring for your own needs is not selfish. It’s necessary, and in many ways it needs to be your first priority. Do less, in order to go farther and accomplish MORE long term.
Your Season Of Life Matters
The season of life that you’re in is going to dictate so much of what you should be expecting from yourself. If you have young children who still rely on you for everything, I encourage you to steer clear of the “getting it all done” mindset all together. In that short season of life the most important things to focus on are caring for the needs of your family and of yourself.
If you have older children who are more independent, you can likely begin to take on some small tasks here and there that you couldn’t before. Or maybe you decide to start an online business or take on a new hobby. Those are all good things! But set specific work hours for the different tasks at hand, and do your best not to over do it.
Be Careful What You Sacrifice
Do not sacrifice sleep, eating healthy foods or spending quiet time with the Lord in an effort to check off more boxes. You need to nourish yourself so you can get up each morning and continue to get stuff done!
But you will never truly get it ALL done. That’s a lie that has taken hold of so many hearts lately (mine included).
As moms, we need to stand up against this trend, learn when to step out of the race and have peace with watching from the sidelines. Reaching this place of acceptance and refusing to sacrifice our basic needs makes a huge difference when it comes to our overall health and productivity.
Aim For Consistency
The last point I will share with you is that aiming for consistency in your daily schedule, rather than scrambling to get it all done each day is going to serve you way better in the long run.
Consistent routines will set you up for success in all areas of your life.
Ask yourself if there is a specific time of day that you are most productive. For me, early mornings are when I’m at my best! So, my morning routine includes way more than my evening routine does. This means I aim to accomplish more in the mornings than I do in the evenings, and it’s a consistent routine I can realistically stick to.
Also, being consistent with reading my Bible at the start of each day has proven to be the most important part of my morning. By doing this I’m not only being obedient to the Lord, but I’m giving Him my time and attention so that He can give me the fuel I need for each day.
Nourishing myself spiritually has helped me to stay consistent in other areas of my life. And being consistent with my daily routine helps me avoid time wasters like scrolling social media in moments of overwhelm.
My Encouragement To You
In no way am I saying I have it all together! It’s a daily effort to force myself to slow down and prioritize. But stepping off the “getting it all done” treadmill feels really, really good.
If you have been taking on too many projects or feel like you’re failing because you can’t seem to accomplish as much as someone else….just pause. Take a step back, be honest with yourself and start prioritizing. Be ready to let some things go, even if just for a season.
You aren’t a machine that simply needs an oil change every now and then to function properly. You’re a living, breathing, beautiful human being with complex thoughts, needs, and emotions. God has gifted you in specific ways and has a plan for your life that may not be the same as someone else’s. In fact, I can say with confidence that it isn’t, because we are all unique.
Steward well what God has given you, and remember that that includes your own mind, body and spirit! You will never get it ALL done, but you absolutely can do what God has placed in front of you today. Care for your babies, your home, your husband, and yourself. Strive to be content and remember that limitations are not a sign of weakness. They simply remind us of our need for a Savior!
Blessings!
~Maryann
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