Homeschooling is a beautiful thing and as I reflect on our life as homeschoolers, I am filled with immense gratitude for this lifestyle we have chosen. But sometimes, we find ourselves in a difficult season, and homeschooling starts to feel overwhelming. I want you to know that even though you’re just reading words on a screen right now, they are written by a real homeschool mom who is walking this journey right alongside you. I want you to know that I understand what that’s like. I’ve been there and in fact, at the time of writing this, I am currently experiencing some hard days myself. In this blog post, I’m sharing with you how we handle homeschooling when life is hard.
I hope you find some encouragement here, and please feel free to connect with me by commenting down below about what you’re going through. If nothing else, I would be happy to pray for you and remind you that you aren’t alone.
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When hard times come
It really doesn’t matter whether our kids are in public school or if we homeschool, one thing is guaranteed – hard times happen.
However, as homeschool parents, I think we often feel an extra load of pressure during the tough times. This is because we continue to carry the responsibility of our children’s education, no matter what is happening in our lives. It remains there, needing us, even when it feels like our world is caving in. This can add a lot of stress on our shoulders, even when we love homeschooling.
So how should we handle homeschooling when life is hard? Well, that will depend on many factors such as the circumstances you’re in, where you are in your homeschooling journey, and how much support you have. There is no “one way” to do homeschooling on good days, which means there’s also no “one way” to do it on bad days.
I’m not here to tell you how to do things, but rather to share how WE handle these difficult seasons in our own life and homeschool. Throughout my years of homeschooling, I have learned that it’s ok to slow down and respect the season of life we’re in. And when it comes to homeschooling during those hard seasons, sometimes slowing down is exactly what is needed.
Focusing on what matters
As a homeschooling parent, one thing I’ve learned over the years is that there are some things that can wait. When we are experiencing tough days or seasons, I try my best to stay focused on what matters the most at that specific time.
At the time of writing this blog post, my 6 year old son is recovering from surgery. Although I thank the Lord that what he is going through is nothing life threatening by any means, I am still carrying a huge burden right now as I care for his physical and emotional needs during his recovery. Now, when I say burden I am not implying that I view caring for my son as a negative thing – rather the opposite really. Caring for my son is my top priority right now, and I take this responsibility very seriously. But because it’s my top priority, I have to be willing to put some other things on hold for now.
What my son needs is time to rest and recover, not school work. What my daughter needs is reassurance that her brother will be ok, and that during this challenging time in our home, our strong foundation is not cracking. What matters the most, is that my children learn that different seasons of life require different actions, and that no matter what happens, they can rely on their family for support.
Homeschooling is so much more than math and science, and my top priority within our homeschool is my relationship with my children. Therefore, during the hard days that life brings us, I need to maintain that priority by focusing on what really matters and what will ultimately bring us closer together as a family.
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Handling the homeschool day
Life is ever evolving, and with that comes so many different seasons. Whatever life situation you are facing right now, whether it is chronic illness, frequent visits to the emergency room, or just a string of life changes that are causing a particular challenge for your homeschool – you can and will get through this.
When the stresses of life are heavy, you can still create a sense of unity and strength within your homeschool. Homeschool is really just an extension of life, so remember that learning comes from so much more than textbooks. The most important thing to focus on during any challenging season is relationships within your family, and nothing more.
As homeschool moms, we tend to get a little too worked up over the academic side of learning at times. We feel pressure from society or maybe even a family member, to make sure our kids don’t “fall behind”. So we often try adding too many things into our schedule that perhaps we don’t really need. This can lead to a lot of overwhelm in our regular daily life, let alone our hard days.
So, when thinking about how to handle homeschooling when life is hard, remember what’s most important to your family as a whole, and be willing to put a few things on the shelf that can wait.
Practical ways to handle homeschooling during the hard times
Here are a few of the ways WE handle our homeschool during the tough times that I have learned throughout my homeschool years. Some of these are things we are doing right now as my son recovers from his surgery, and others are things we have done in the past.
These are meant to be ideas, not necessarily a guideline, as every family and situation is unique. But be encouraged when going through this list, because you will see that not every solution is pinterest worthy! These are practical, everyday options that you can use to handle homeschooling when life is hard and you just don’t have the time, or capacity, to maintain your normal routine.
1. Read alouds
This is something we are doing right now in our current situation. Because my son is recovering from surgery, he is doing a lot of sitting around. So a few days before his surgery, I went to our local library and borrowed a few books to use as read alouds with the kids. I chose ones we’ve never heard of before that have really fun story lines, and encompass themes my children are interested in.
Not only does this make the sitting around a little more fun, it also unites us as a family. Homeschool families spend a lot of time together and that becomes a normal part of life. So when our routine is disrupted, we can easily feel disjointed. Snuggling up together and reading a good book is a great way to keep everyone together and create a feeling of “normal” during the difficult times.
2. Educational movies
Movies in general, but especially educational movies are a wonderful way to supplement your homeschool time. There are so many great movies and documentaries you can watch, if for whatever reason your regular routine just isn’t possible.
I’m well aware that there are some people out there who are ready to judge any mom who puts their child in front of the TV…but I am not one of those people! I see nothing wrong with using the TV as a tool and practicing moderation with it.
Ask your kids what they want to learn about or what they’re interested in right now, and find a movie or documentary on those things. YouTube is a great resource for this because it has videos on almost every topic you can think of! However, if you have younger kids and you aren’t comfortable with YouTube, your local library can also be a really good resource as well.
Pop some popcorn, and let your kids dive into topics such as outer space, marine life, and everything in between! It’s totally ok to do this, and remember, homeschooling is a long process and you need to keep the big picture in mind. What do you want your kids to remember the most? That one math lesson on dividing 2 digit numbers, or how your family found ways to enjoy each other and learn new things, even during a rough patch?
I think you know the answer, so let go of any guilt you may be feeling during this time and focus on just getting through it while keeping your family culture in tact.
3. Play games
Sometimes depending on what our current situation is, we just don’t have the time to sit down and hang out with our kids. However, that doesn’t mean they can’t hang out with each other! Games are a great way to fill up some time for your children, and let them simply enjoy being together.
Board games are really fun and can even be educational depending on the game. But not everything needs to be “educational”, all of the time. There are times in life that as homeschoolers, we need to just allow our kids to be kids and let them play. (In fact, that should be a part of homeschooling in general, but that’s a different topic.)
So whether your kids like playing board games, or perhaps there is a video game they enjoy – go ahead, let them play! I know this goes against the common (although untrue) opinion that, “Good moms don’t let their kids play video games”. Just ignore those opinions, and do what you know is best for your child in the moment.
Right now, because my son is basically couch bound for a few days, we’re allowing him a bit more screen time than we normally do. Typically, we have strict rules around when our kids can play video games and when they can’t – but this week, those rules are less important to me than keeping my son comfortable and happily distracted from what he’s going through.
Like I said before, remember the big picture of homeschooling. Will a few extra days of Nintendo while my son recovers from surgery ruin his life? No, absolutely not. Will him feeling loved because he got some extra special treatment from us while going through a rough time, remain with him for the rest of his life? Yes, it actually might!
My approach to handling hard times in our home and homeschool, is to just do whatever is best for that situation. It doesn’t have to be best forever, just for right now.
4. Focus on life skills
A great way to handle homeschooling when life is really hard, is by focusing on life skills. Learning life skills is such a beautiful part of homeschooling during the good times, and that doesn’t have to change during the bad times. Challenges in life can be amazing training grounds for our kids.
If someone in the family is sick, help your children learn some kitchen skills and make a meal. If you’re struggling with a financial situation and need to make some lifestyle changes, take that opportunity to work with your older children and teach them how to set a budget. Even your younger children can learn things like basic chores and daily tasks, that may end up getting neglected depending on what’s happening in your life.
Whatever situation you are facing, there will most likely be some gaps that need to be filled. Keep your eyes open to where your children could step in and fill those voids. They will gain the confidence of a new skill, and also feel the reward of helping out in a time of need.
5. Find some fun online classes
This is a really great way to help with your children’s education, if you find yourself in a situation where your attention can’t be devoted to your homeschool for longer periods of time. There are so many amazing online classes you can sign your kids up for that are extremely affordable, and will keep them engaged and learning while you take care of things.
Outschool.com is one we have used a few times and we really like them! You can register your child for online classes in almost anything, and you can pay per class which means cancelling is really easy. Some classes are done in a group setting on platforms such as Zoom, while some are one on one with the instructor.
This is a great resource and has been really helpful for us in various seasons of our homeschool in the past!
6. Have another homeschool friend over to play
Lastly, depending on what you are going through, inviting another homeschool friend over to hang out can be a great way to handle your homeschool time when life is hard. Giving your kids some extra social time, all while possibly getting their minds off of whatever may be going on and letting them have some fun, is never a bad idea!
If you have some friends in your homeschool community that live close by, see if their kids are available for a play date. You could even take that opportunity to have a coffee chat with the other mom and lean on her for support. I have done this many times, and honestly, it is always so helpful! Allowing friends or family to support you through your challenging times in life is really important, and it’s one of the life lessons you can be teaching your children by modeling it in your own life.
Give yourself some grace Mamma
I am all too familiar with the feeling of mom guilt, when we aren’t able to do it all and be everything for our kids. I’m a work in progress when it comes to that, but I do think I am starting to learn how to give myself some grace.
The last thing our children need is a mom who chases perfection all the time. They need to see their mother be dependant on God’s Grace to get her through. They need stability, love and protection – not perfection.
If you are going through a season of life where you have no extra time for some of the things you normally do in your homeschool, that’s ok. Let them go for now, because this too shall pass. And remember, I’m in one of those seasons right now as I type out these words, so I really do understand. I know it’s hard, but just continue to love your children and provide them with the safe and stable home they need, and they will thrive despite the circumstances of today.
Also, make sure to spend lots of time in prayer. God loves you immensely, and He will give you the strength you need to handle what’s in front of you. He has done it for me, and is doing so even today – so I know He will for you!
Blessings!
~Maryann
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