Things You Should know before starting to homeschool: Top 10

When I first started homeschooling, there was a lot I didn’t know! So to help you get started, I have assembled a list of the 10 things you should know before starting to homeschool.

Knowing these things would have made those early days so much easier to navigate! My hope is that I can help you avoid some of the mistakes I made when I first started my homeschooling journey.

1. There is a difference between “homeschooling” and “school at home”

There’s a reason I made this the first one on the list! Of all the things you should know before starting to homeschool, this one is pretty big!

When you have zero homeschooling experience, and like me, had a public school upbringing, all you know school to be is what it looks like in the public school system. So when I started homeschooling, I thought I had to create a “classroom” of sorts in my home. This is really NOT necessary! Homeschooling is not, nor should it be, the same as public school. So do not feel pressured to try and recreate that system within your home. 

Find a spot in your house that you enjoy being in, whether you’re homeschooling or not, and make that the place where you gather with your children. It could be the living room, the kitchen table, or even outside if the weather is nice. Essentially, homeschooling can and should look however you want it to look. 

Also, you don’t need school desks, or brightly coloured posters showcasing the multiplication tables plastered all over your walls in order for your children to learn. Children are learning all the time, in so many ways. They WILL still learn without a laminated poster on the wall. (I know this from experience..ha!)

2. Resist the urge to compare

This is another one of the very important things you should know before starting to homeschool. Please, whatever you do – do NOT compare your kids or your homeschool to anyone else’s! This is a trap I’ve fallen into so many times, and it always leads to despair. 

Every child has their own unique learning style and individual needs. Every family dynamic is different. People’s interests, strengths, and weaknesses are different. You as the homeschool parent are unique as well. Your family’s homeschool journey needs to be just as unique. It’s okay to gather ideas from other homeschoolers, but do not play the comparison game. You will lose every single time, trust me. 

Usually, comparison leads to unrealistic expectations for your children. Why? Because you’re attempting to put them into somebody else’s box. Embrace the individuality of your child, and don’t let what other people are doing lure you into this trap. 

3. It’s harder than I thought

This is not meant to scare you or to sound negative. It’s just a fact. The things I thought were going to be hard, like teaching math or science, actually are not what’s most challenging. (There are tons of resources available to help you with that.) 

During the first year of homeschooling, or first few years even, finding your groove is what most families struggle with the most. I know I tried many different routines, plans, and curriculums in an effort to figure out what felt right for my family. It’s hard when you’ve poured all of your energy into something, only to discover that the “thing” you spent so much time on, actually isn’t a good fit. 

This is very normal though, and every homeschooling mom or dad I know has experienced this. So don’t be hard on yourself! If you think you could use a little help with creating a routine that will work for your family, check out this article I wrote all about this exact topic. It has lots of helpful ideas!

4. The importance of a homeschool community

This is one of the things you should know before starting to homeschool that may or may not be an issue for you. Because of my personality, it was for me. So I thought I’d better share it just in case!

I actually felt really stressed about getting involved in a homeschool community when I first started homeschooling. I thought it meant that I would have to be out, with other people, ALL the time. With my personality, I just can’t do that and still have mental energy for our lesson plans, let alone maintain things at home. But over the years, I have learned what a blessing a good homeschool community actually is. 

First of all, don’t worry. You do not need to attend every event or outing your homeschool group suggests. You can still adhere to your own schedule, and you have the freedom to say no to things. It’s not about obligation. It’s about support. 

When I get together with other homeschool moms and we do life together, I come away feeling refreshed every time. As new homeschoolers, it’s so important to have the support and encouragement of seasoned homeschool families who have been through it all! So please, don’t shy away from finding a homeschool community around you. It’s not about doing all the outings, it’s about the relationships and support that community will bring. 

5. The beauty of homeschooling

I really wish I knew how beautiful homeschooling was before I started. If I did, I think I would have started it sooner. There’s a magic to being together every day, and just doing life with each other. Young children benefit from being around older siblings, and because you spend so much time together, there’s this really amazing bond that forms. 

I remember being nervous about being with my kids all day every day. I was worried I wasn’t patient enough, and thought I wouldn’t be able to handle it. But I had no idea how being with them would refine me, and bring so much beauty and richness into our home. 

The togetherness of homeschooling also provides countless learning opportunities for all the different ages in your family, including you as the parent! It really has added a whole other dimension of love within our family unit. It absolutely is beautiful. 

If you’re reading this and haven’t started homeschooling yet, have a peek at my blog post all about the top reasons why you should homeschool. It may answer some of your questions, and help put your mind at ease if you are struggling with a sense of doubt.  

6. You don’t need to do ALL the things

Ok here we go – another one of the very important things you should know before starting to homeschool! As a new homeschooling mom, I thought I would need to go on tons of field trips, do exciting science experiments every single week, and organize elaborate art projects to show our family when they visited. I very quickly realized however that even though those things can be good, there was no way I could keep up with doing it all. Especially while trying to maintain our home and do the many other things a stay-at-home mom does on a daily basis. 

At first, I felt like a failure. But after awhile I realized that doing ALL the things, is simply not required of me. My kids don’t need extra fun and exciting adventures all the time, and I certainly don’t need the added stress of trying to fit it all in. 

What you decide to take on will largely depend on a few things:

• your family dynamic
• your homeschool method
• whether or not you are also working a part/full time job
• the interests of your family

I’m here to tell you that you are NOT meant to do it all, and you can’t do it all. So please, don’t even try. Pick and choose what’s most important for you and your family, and do those things. Don’t worry about the rest!

7. Grade level doesn’t matter

When you get into homeschooling and start exploring different homeschool curriculum, you will start to see a pattern – grade level doesn’t really matter. In the public school system it does, because they need to have a way of organizing hundreds of children. And we all know that in any typical classroom setting, there will be children with varying levels of development. 

You however, only need to organize YOUR children. So with homeschooling, the grade level of your child sort of loses it’s importance after a while, because it’s all about where they’re at with their learning vs what grade they’re in. Children will be at different levels with different subjects, and that’s normal. Your “5th grader” might be doing grade 5 math, grade 3 language arts, and grade 7 science! One of the many freedoms of homeschooling is that we can meet our children where they are, and simply encourage their continual learning. 

8. The need to “deschool” yourself

Before I started down the homeschooling path, I had never even heard the term “deschool”. I had no idea what it meant, nor did I even know it existed. But let me tell you, if you’re a new homeschooling parent who was raised in the private or public school system, then you need to deschool yourself. It took me a while to figure this out, but once I did, it made a huge difference in our homeschool life!

What this means is actually pretty simple – you need to take however long it takes for you to STOP viewing “school” as how you know school to be. This means no homeschool “school work” during this time. None. You’re kids will be okay, I promise! My children and I went through periods of deschooling for about a year before we finally felt like we had shed the public school mentality.

Homeschool is so immensely different than any school system. It’s up to you how you want to structure your days, and whether or not you will even do any formal school work at all. Some families don’t use any curriculum and simply allow and encourage their children to learn naturally through play and experiences. Some families enjoy using textbooks and curriculum, while others do a blend of everything.

In order to move away from the conventional “school” mentality, and fully embrace homeschooling, you need to deschool yourself first. If your children have been in the public school system, they too will need to go through a deschooling process to better understand their new routines and expectations. Take as much time as you need, and release what you have been taught “learning” looks like. 

9. The new curriculum trap

This is one I will humbly admit to falling prey to…more than once! There is a trap that new homeschool moms fall into, and that is the trap of thinking that new or different curriculums will solve all of their homeschool problems. This is a LIE! 

I’m not saying that finding the right curriculum for your family isn’t possible, it absolutely 100% is! And most families have to try a few different ones until they find the one that fits. That’s normal. 

But sometimes, usually about mid-way through the school year, things can start to wilt a little bit and it’s easy to find yourself in a slump. This is where the curriculum trap gets you! Let me give you an example…

The Lie

One day, you’re scrolling social media and another homeschool mom has posted a picture of her smiling children, all gathered together in perfect harmony, without a single complaint, and happily doing their school work. (I think we can all acknowledge that pictures can lie, right?) Nevertheless, you assume that if you just start using what SHE is using with HER kids, your life will be perfect and your children will never complain about school again! 

The Reality

So, you buy the curriculum she’s using, and await your homeschool saviour in textbook form! Except, it never works out this way. First of all, the only Saviour in the world is Jesus, and ultimately your happiest and most fulfilling homeschool time will come when you invite Him in. But secondly, just because something works for someone else, does not mean it will work for you. 

So go ahead and try new things, but monitor your expectations. Instead of jumping around constantly between different unit studies or lesson plans, the best thing you can do is to pay attention to your kids, pray, and trust the process. 

You will find what works for you, I promise. 

10. The freedom of homeschooling 

I wish I knew how much freedom I would have in homeschooling my children. Pretty much everything is up to us homeschool parents. Now, depending on where you live, you do have to know your provincial or state laws around homeschooling. Every province or state has its own unique guidelines and record keeping requirements surrounding homeschooling. So, before anything else, make sure you know exactly what’s required of you before starting each year. 

But once you know, you are then free to make your unique homeschool look however you want it to look! You get to decide what your family does or doesn’t do, based on your child’s needs. 

You have total freedom to create your own homeschooling plans, decide how many days each week you want to “do school”, and so much more. Even if your provincial/state laws are a bit more specific on hours required or even testing, you are still able to control the majority of what your children will do. Homeschooling really is very freeing, and watching your children thrive because of that freedom is truly beautiful. 

Blessings!

~Maryann